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So dearest sweet Claire, I thought l might take this opportunity to Ask the Angels about where lm at. My journey since being diagnosed with breast cancer late last year and emerging from the intensive treatment, lm back at work and feeling terribly vulnerable, tired and super grumpy and the whole shamoz some days. What to do, where to go, how to help myself?
And in all of this lm beginning to loose my feel for living in this community, l can't find me here much anymore. And a woman here who has been an incredible support, we were in a relationship of sorts some time back, but now l seem to rarely be able to find my core sense of self with, emotional strength, a knowing of me. I feel like lm convenient. l just can't see, or don't want to see, what's playing out.
What do l need to know or do dear Claire? I'm so tired and a bit of a ship wreck some days.
With love and blessings. Thank you.
November 10, 2015
Thank you for your question.
What a big journey you have been on.
Since it wasn’t all that long ago that you were diagnosed and treated, I am not surprised that you feel really vulnerable. I also know that participating in life can be exactly the right thing to do as a part of the healing process. However, I feel that if you were able to afford to have more time away from work it would be really helpful. This would allow your cellular body more restful time to adjust and integrate all the new information it has received over the last year. If that is not possible then I will give you some practical suggestions about what you can do to support the cellular body’s healing process.
I am not a scientist - so bare with me.
At some stage prior to the cancer manifesting in your body, you were fed information via the cellular body that cancer cells were present, and unfortunately for whatever reason your immune system did not recognize that those cells were multiplying. Since your diagnosis, you have been providing new information via medicines, procedures, treatments etc, that you don’t want the cancer to live or flourish in your body anymore. However because that is a lot of information, which is affected by your emotional, mental and general physical health, more attention needs to be given to your body so that the information can be integrated. As I said, I am not a scientist - so I hope you understand my message so far?
Okay so what can you do?
On an emotional level the Angels are asking you to ponder if you have absolutely made up your mind to stay here and continue to live your life. I know that is a big question as often we believe that we absolutely want to be here, but sometimes when you dig a little deeper its not how it is at all. To find the answer to that question perhaps seek the counsel of a healer or any healing professional you completely trust to help you navigate your way into those more hidden places within the emotional body. Kinesiology can also be a good way to access that sort of information. Whatever you discover it will be really helpful to your overall healing process and any decisions that you may need to make once you have accessed the information.
For your physical well being you need to continue to maintain an organic diet whenever possible. And include some bone broth soups. And naturally drink lots of good water and be consistent with attending to your gut flora, as it does feel a bit out of whack still. This is not uncommon, as I am sure you probably already know, especially after what you have been through.
On a spiritual level the Angels are asking that you continue to pray, as praying is a beautiful way for you to connect with spiritual guidance, and the abundance of love that is available for you as you continue your healing journey.
On a mental level, please try to avoid stress - I know you have probably been told that a million times already. One way you can do this, is by continuing to have good boundaries and keep saying no if you need to. You can also do this, by surrendering to the knowledge that you haven’t recovered from everything you have been through and that it’s okay to need more time for your recovery.
This does not make you slower than everyone else at recovery after cancer; it simply means you are only part way through your recovery.
Furthermore, because nothing will ever be the same again, you haven’t had enough time to become the new you; as those last fragments of the old need more time to be honored and let go of.
Therefore, it is natural at this stage of any one’s process to feel empty, lacking in confidence, tire easily and on some days feel hopeless and without faith. The transition stage during any time of big change after trauma, is often the most vulnerable and requires an enormous amount of tolerance, patience and self-compassion to move through it. And it may also require you to take the time to sit and be still, regularly, and just breathe. Not necessarily what you feel like doing when you feel out of sorts or in turmoil.
The Angels are again reminding me to tell you to pray, as prayer is your friend, your comforter, and your personal guide to the Divine light within.
I hope this has been helpful, many blessings for your recovery and a return to good health and spiritual wellbeing.
If you have any further questions please don’t hesitate to ask.
In regards to your question about your friend I will do that either by writing to you personally or making arrangements to chat via phone or skype.